Dane-zaa (Dunne-za)

When matriarchs begin to disappear, there is a choice to either step into the places they left behind, or to craft a new space.

Helen Knott’s bestselling debut memoir, In My Own Moccasins, wowed reviewers, award juries, and readers alike with its profoundly honest and moving account of addiction, intergenerational trauma, resilience, and survival. Now, with her highly anticipated second book, Knott exceeds the highest of expectations with a chronicle of grief, love, and legacy. Having lost both her mom and grandmother in just over six months, forced to navigate the fine lines between matriarchy, martyrdom, and codependency, Knott realizes she must let go, not just of them, but of who she thought she was.

Woven into the pages are themes of mourning, sobriety through loss, and generational dreaming. Becoming a Matriarch is charted with poetic insights, sass, humour, and heart, taking the reader over the rivers and mountains of Dane Zaa territory in Northeastern British Columbia, along the cobbled streets of Antigua, Guatemala, and straight to the heart of what matriarchy truly means. This is a journey through pain, on the way to becoming.

Through writing, reflecting, and dreaming I found my way to the real lessons.
I found permission to become whoever I needed to be.
I found permission to live a life and not just endure it.
I found permission to belong deeply to myself.
I found permission to lay to rest the sorrow of the women before me and to cultivate joy for us in its place.

Awards

• 2024 BC Book Awards - The George Ryga Award for Social Awareness in Literature winner

Reviews
“In enchantingly vivid language and with a compelling narrative arc, Helen Knott’s new masterpiece is a memoir of grief and joy, loss and rediscovery, flight and return and, above all, a paean to the beautiful, eternal, soothing and all-encompassing power of matriarchy.” —Gabor Maté MD, author of The Myth of Normal: Trauma, Illness and Healing in a Toxic Culture

“Knott lays out that which all Indigenous women know and feel on a cellular level—we are only here because of the women, the matriarchs, the warriors, the survivors, the courageous ones, the fierce ones, the loving ones who came before us. Beautifully, tenderly Knott maps out for the reader the intrinsic way Indigenous women lift up, celebrate and support one another. Even when no one else does. We always have each other. We see each other. We are each other’s medicine. And there is no greater gift. These are the stories Indigenous women must tell—the journeys, reclamation and place of matriarchs. Present in Knott’s words are paths to reconciliation for everyone.” —Nahanni Fontaine, Member of the Legislative Assembly of Manitoba

“Becoming a Matriarch is a vivid, lyrical exploration of womanhood, loss, grief, and eventually, self-love, braided together with radiance and wisdom. Knott brilliantly uses memory as a tool for self-exploration and growth. The land, dreams and body are in constant communication: ‘My body knows the mountains and rivers and berry bushes that it comes from.’ Throughout the book you can’t help but ask yourself, what does it mean to come from strong women and still allow yourself space to be loved? Becoming a Matriarch teaches us that joy can exist inside the cracks of the most tumultuous times in our lives and love can still bloom if we let it.” —Chelene Knight, author of Dear Current Occupant and Junie

“Becoming a Matriarch is a feast of remarkable, colourful, deep and profoundly raw storytelling. Helen Knott is one of the greatest Indigenous literary artists of our time.” —Brandi Morin, author of Our Voice of Fire: A Memoir of a Warrior Rising

Additional Information
224 pages | 5.18" x 8.00" | Paperback

Helen Knott, a highly accomplished Indigenous woman, seems to have it all. But in her memoir, she offers a different perspective. In My Own Moccasins is an unflinching account of addiction, intergenerational trauma, and the wounds brought on by sexual violence. It is also the story of sisterhood, the power of ceremony, the love of family, and the possibility of redemption.

With gripping moments of withdrawal, times of spiritual awareness, and historical insights going back to the signing of Treaty 8 by her great-great grandfather, Chief Bigfoot, her journey exposes the legacy of colonialism, while reclaiming her spirit.

Reviews
"A beautiful rendering of how recovery for our peoples is inevitably about reconnecting with Indigenous identities, lands, cultural and healing practices." —Kim Anderson, author of Reconstructing Native Womenhood

"In My Own Moccasins never flinches. The story goes dark, and then darker. We live in an era where Indigenous women routinely go missing, our youth are killed and disposed of like trash, and the road to justice doesn’t seem to run through the rez. Knott’s journey is familiar, filled with the fallout of residential school, racial injustice, alcoholism, drugs, and despair. But she skillfully draws us along and opens up her life, her family, and her communities to show us a way forward. It’s the best kind of memoir: clear-eyed, generous, and glorious….Bear witness to the emergence of one of the most powerful voices of her generation." —Eden Robinson, author of Son of a Trickster and Monkey Beach (from the foreword)

“Helen Knott speaks truth to the experience of Indigenous women living through the violence of colonized spaces and she does so with grace, beauty and a ferocity that makes me feel so proud.” —Leanne Betasamosake Simpson, author of This Accident of Being Lost

“Helen writes beautifully and painfully, about her own life and the lives of many of our sisters. A strong, gentle voice removing the colonial blanket and exposing truth.” —Maria Campbell, author of Halfbreed

“An incredible debut that documents how trauma and addiction can be turned into healing and love. I am in awe of Helen Knott and her courage. I am a fan for life. Wow.” —Richard Van Camp, author of The Lesser Blessed

“Heartfelt, heartbreaking, triumphant and raw, In My Own Moccasinsis a must-read for anyone who's ever felt lost in their life… Actually, it's a must-read for anyone who appreciates stories of struggle, redemption and healing. Knott’s writing is confident, clear, powerful and inspiring.”—Jowita Bydlowska, author of Guy: A Novel and Drunk Mom

Additional Information
366 pages | 6.00" x 9.00"